I hung the mirror higher
and tried to be tall,
and could see from the chin up...
but that was all.
though, from a sitting position,
my reflected room
showed light and space,
not an empty gloom.
My Oma would know,
as I believe she once said,
that rooms grow on
even after we're dead.
- Location:home again
- Music:ancestral whispers
After going back into the hospital and then a brief stay at hospice Dad finally gave it up and moved on Sun. 15th of February. It's been a pretty rough past month going back and forth to Milwaukee to try to help with everything, but the memorial service this last Sat. went very well, although with the blizzard turnout was a little bit low. Still looking for a new forever home for Buddy, Dad's cat, who traveled back to Madison with me yesterday and is now reluctantly confined to my spare bedroom until I can place him. I'd love to keep him myself, but my other 4 boys made it very clear that 1 more cat in the apartment is 1 too many. He's a very healthy, playful and affectionate 14 yr. old Maine Coon, but not exactly a lap cat. He's neutered, front declawed, fully up-to-date on his shots (3 yrs on the rabies) and just recently had a "lion-cut" haircut. He'd do best in a home without children or other animals as he's been an "only-cat" for his whole life. He's completely litter trained, but likes to have his box cleaned frequently, and will occasionally meow at the box until it's cleaned if he's not happy with it. Any help in finding him a good home would be most appreciated, references and landlord approval required. Please email me at kellethia at gmail dot com.
- Music:Yes: An evening of Yes music plus
Dad has been back at home for a little over a month. He's not doing well. Will have my new(er) car soon with many thanks to all of my wonderful family who gave up the yearly Kris Kringle gift exchange to help. No thanks whatsoever to my ex-roommate and supposed friend who still owes me over $1,100.00. I'm sure Dad will be going to a better place soon.
it's morning at night
and we have all the right
to plant all our dreams
in the evening
and when the real morning comes
as everyday does
we shall shine
all our light on believing
Big birthday shout-out tolipf3tish
today! Sorry I won't be able to make it out tonight, but hope you have a really great time and that this next year brings you bountiful gifts and everything you're looking for!! Hope to kick it with ya sometime soon... (:
- Music:birthday song
Been pretty down (physically) the last couple of weeks after the last several months of going back and forth to Milw. trying to help Dad w/ everything has really caught up with me. He's still in the cardio rehab facility and since my car is no longer able to make the trip, borrowing a friend's car and taking the bus is very tiring and taxing, not to mention expensive. The bus is way more expensive as cab fare to and from the bus depot plus the round-trip ticket adds up to about $80.00 per trip, ouch! Looks like a quiet t-day here, just me & the cats, which is fine. I picked up an all-natural cornish hen, never made one of those before, so something new and hopefully yummy anyway. I'm also reading Michael Ondaatje's latest Divisadero, am about halfway through and it's very captivating, not quite sure if it's on the same par as The English Patient, but will see.
I just love this time of year, my absolute favorite. The colors of the trees, the cooler weather, the harvest of blessings before Thanksgiving. Looking forward to the little munchkins in our neighborhood all dressed up and trick-or-treating. I also cleansed my alter last night and gave it a makeover this morning. I was just finishing up and was trying to think of what was missing...what's missing?, what's missing? Then I noticed my Bast statuette. Of course, I saved the Bast for last!
Still a bit drained from another trip to Milw. this last weekend, actually Sun./Mon. and getting stuff done for Dad. He was transferred to another cardio rehab facility, at least a little closer to his home, but when I got there Sun. he looked worse than he did at the hospital. He had been put on a fluid restricted diet to try to reduce the edema in his legs, bad move, and the doctors had decided to pressure-wrap his legs again, even worse move! His feet were purple and he truly looked closer to death's door than I had ever seen him. I won't go into the gory details, but he really seemed ready to give up. Well, needless to say we got that straightened out and he even gave me a good "Godddammit, Kelly!!!" yesterday for keeping friends and relatives updated on his condition, which, thanks to a cool Norski up in Appleton, Dad got his phone connected in his room and now can do that for himself. Think he's round the bend at least for now, but that gave me a bit of a scare. Which is I guess appropriate for this time of year when the veil thins on All-Hallow's-Eve and got me to thinking a bit...
I stopped at the library the other day and a movie/documentary that I had seen before, but not really watched (or is it the other way around?) just jumped out at me...anyway, I watched Ram Dass Fierce Grace
again last night and it helped put some things back into perspective. Funny how sometimes when you really need something the Universe provides. Pretty much my whole life has been like that. I had read his book Be Here Now
back in my early teens and need to find a copy of that again. Also, mad props to rhino777
for loaning me his hooptie one more time!
...after wearing himself out partying for his 75th birthday, going off his diet, drinking...yeah, go figure. The car did sell, all went to past due bills, ugh. My annual Fall sinus infection has kicked in, and I'm just trying to stay positive b/c I can't be in Milwaukee tomorrow when he has the pacemaker surgery. Can't take a chance on giving this to him. Have been back and forth thanks to relatives and friends, and major thanks to rhino777
specifically for use of his car and last weekend's help w/ boxes from the attic, books, very heavy lifting and think I wore myself out and got sick in part b/c of that, even with all of the help. Thanks also to sophy
for the boxes. (: Just trying to stay positive and heal while also sending prayers to my dad. Any focused thoughts or meditations are much appreciated, the operation is @ 11:00 A.M. CDT tomorrow.
...and lived to tell about it! Trying to get him to go through all of his stuff is like pulling teeth w/o an anesthetic, but there was at least some major help from from aunts & uncles to get stuff done that I wouldn't have been able to do otherwise. His health is still up and down, depending upon how well he's following his diet and watching his blood sugars and for now we're putting off any major move until next Spring with the hopes of continuing to clean out 40 years accumulated belongings (crap) that he doesn't want to part with, mostly books and old files at this point. Dr. appointments and errands are very trying, and tiring, but we were able to work in a Brewer's game and dinner for his 75th b-day, which was nice. Also, we were able to get him to part w/ his old chevy, which he shouldn't be driving anymore anyway, but for him was like losing a major freedom, even though he had let the registration and insurance expire last May. :( Hope I can get a decent price on it for him to pay for his new glasses prescription and orthopedic shoes. Here's a pic if anyone is interested...
it's a 1979 Chevy Impala and has only 72,000 original miles, needs a tune-up, and has some rust underneath, but has otherwise been garaged for the past 12+ yrs that he's had it. Drove like a dream on the highway (v-8 baby!) from Milwaukee to Madison and I'd keep it myself if I had another parking space in back and could afford to fix it up. Asking $850.00/OBO.
- Location:back home!
- Music:Grateful Dead: Europe '72